Childfree Reflections

With Marcia Drut-Davis

Archive for the ‘Societal Responsibilities’ Category

May 7th, 2014 by Marcia Davis

Mother’s Day In America 2014

Mother’s Day In America

By Marcia Drut-Davis

Before I share some heartfelt emotions, I want to honor those mothers, grandmothers and aunts who devote their lives to their children, grandchildren nieces or nephews. There are many deserving of adoration. How lucky for those children!

Sadly, in my opinion, the Mother’s Day celebration in America is another example of the dangers of pronatalism. It exalts the status of being a mother to something short of being a saint. Just the mere mention of the revered word “mother’ makes many swoon with love and joy. It discounts the many hearts hurting from abuse or indifference. It forgets those children who suffer from their mothers who were never parent material in the first place. It encourages more to get that title to become a part of societal or religious expectations so they can get the same attention.

We forget the damage to those facing infertility. They seem to view themselves as “less than” or barren. Look up the word “childless” in any thesaurus and see the negative words associated to infertile. Never are infertile people told about the sheer joy and freedom to live a childfree (not “less”) lifestyle. Never are they told how much they can give to themselves and humanity having more time to “mother” in other ways. It seems the only way is though a baby or child. Really?

How many women mother through their work? How many mother through being a passionate supporter of a green environment? How many mother as devoted  neighbors to children whose moms may be forced to come home late? How many mother as concerned citizens volunteering in government, animal humane societies, Big Sisters or Guardian Ad Litem?

Until we, the childfree by choice, are given as much attention, adoration and accolades on International Non-Parents Day (which is August 1st) there is no equality and no understanding of how wonderful, loving and nurturing we can be without having or raising children.

 

Marcia Drut-Davis is author of, “Confessions of a Childfree Woman” on Amazon.com.

 

August 20th, 2013 by Marcia Davis

CALL TO ACTION AGAINST PRONATALISM

I received an announcement for an upcoming chapter meeting from a wonderful women’s business support group called, ” Women’s Prosperity Network”. I’ve been thinking of joining because I’ve learned that writing a book is the same as having a small business if you want it to reach more people.

I was taken aback when the guest speaker for the next Palm City/Stuart group, chose the topic, “GOING FROM MOMMY TO MOGUL”. OK. It’s the name of her book. I have no objections to that. However, nowhere in the ad for her appearance does it suggest that anyone can learn from her book. When I wrote to the chapter president, who I know to be an incredible, inspiring woman, that night, I received an email from that guest speaker. She was defensive and angry and thought I was writing against her book or the title. OF COURSE NOT! She has the right to have her own niche in writing as I do in writing about the childfree-by-choice.

She’s speaking to a group of women. Period! Women. Is everyone in this support group a mother? Can it be that some are infertile? Or how about the one out of five woman choosing to remain childfree -by- choice?

It’s a dangerous and potentially harmful conclusion to think this topic wouldn’t  be offensive to the women I just mentioned. For those sitting on the fence, it encourages the thought that of course, “success” comes with that revered title of , “Mommy”.

If we want pronatalism to stop, we must take the time to educate and express our feelings. They are real. They are important and, in my opinion, must be heard.

Women’s Prosperity Network is now global. I urge you to share your heartfelt feelings.wpnglobal.com. If we sit back, nothing will change. Right?

 

May 10th, 2011 by Marcia Davis

Should the childfree be taxed for education of children?

There’s a recent discussion as to whether or not people choosing a childfree lifestyle should be taxed for the education of other people’s children. I think back to living on Long Island. I had no children. The family across the street from me had 8. We both paid the same amount in taxes. Is that fair?

I’ve also heard an opinion there should be an exemption for those choosing not to procreate. Your thoughts?