Childfree Reflections

With Marcia Drut-Davis
August 29th, 2011 by Marcia Davis

AARP Magazine: “When Your Kids, Don’t Have Kids” Sept/Oct Issue

Here we go again! First the title. Come on AARP. Not everyone who reads your magazine has children. Your title assumes that your readers are all parents. I read through 5 pages of how to overcome the tragedy of not having grandkids. Not one message about statistics showing how many grandparents are miserable or let down with stark realities of grandchildren. How many never receive a phone call, email or card on their birthdays? How many have to dip into their own retirement accounts to bail out grandchildren making poor choices?

Who out there has the chutzpah to honestly share those unhappy gut-wrenching stories? That would take courage, wouldn’t it. …when everyone thinks having grandchildren is the icing on the cake of parenting.


10 Responses to “AARP Magazine: “When Your Kids, Don’t Have Kids” Sept/Oct Issue”
  1. ElaineByTheBeach says

    I’ve read back issues of the AARPmag, and the editorial slant of it is awfully middle-america/apple pie/vanilla ice cream to me. I think the upcoming generation of those who are of grandparenting age will hopefully be more educated, opinionated, and therefore more likely to discuss some of the realities of grandparenting. The magazine’s current readership is still comprised of those who didn’t have the option of childfreedom, so the magazine is going to preach to the choir…for now, anyway.

    • marciawp says

      I would love to read honest reflections on some of those disappointments grandparents have felt, wouldn’t you? Some of my own personal friends and family have confided their extreme disappointments. Some have taken their grandchildren out of their wills!
      Many people told me the biggest regret I would feel is the loss of grandchildren. Probably….if they were caring, warm, deliciously sweet and fun. (And is I could afford it.) There are never any guarantees as those assurances are never promised in raising children.
      I have seen many people become uber grandparents where their entire lives revolve around their grandchilden sucking out any other possibility. I guess if that fits their needs, it’s OK. For me, I can’t stand hearing all those endless stories about little Lucy’s accomplishments or the photos of Little Lucy in dance class with the same silly look in every moment of frozen time.

      • Umm, are you raelly just giving this info out for nothing?

        • Hi from Denmark!I am a woman born in 1984 and I just got sterilized:-) alcautly I smile like a monkey on dope every time I get to show my scars of, but unfortunately it cannot be shown to every body. only five have seen them. So far.But I am glad I got it done, just not that happy about peoples reactions towards sterilization. My sister has three kids and is undergoing that same surgery I have had in a couple of days, and even though she has kids and runs a daycare, people still seem chocked when she tells about the operation. (She is 37 btw)But any who . Is there a good chance for me to view your apperance on 60 minutes?I would really like to see it and get my boney hands on your book now we are at it;-)Keep speaking up!They can’t ignore us if we just talk louder;-)Sincerly Anne Stenkje6r

          • marciadavis says

            Hi Anne! I remember you! You cant stop people from being ignorant. Nor, would I even try to convince people that my choice is right for me! Just keep on keeping on.
            I have a copy of that 60 Minute program but I can’t share it. I am asking people to contact 60 minutes and request a revisit to that topic shown in 1974! The book can be purchased at
            If you order it, let me know your reactions.
            Wonderful seeing you in this blog!

    • Tip top stuff. I’ll epcxet more now.

    • Well done artcile that. I’ll make sure to use it wisely.

  2. Much appreciated for the information and share!

  3. Thanks for the share!

  4. Very fascinating concept , thankyou with regard to posting.

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