Childfree Reflections

With Marcia Drut-Davis
July 21st, 2017

Childfree Musings

Many of you know about me from my first book, “Confessions of a Childfree Woman: A Life Spent Swimming against The Mainstream”, Amazon.

It was an adventure into raw realities involved in purging or venting my personal story. Some days (or nights) I would sit at my computer, stare at the keyboard and feel there wasn’t one word I

could share.

Other times, my words exploded like a cannon. I felt good. I felt proud until my editor, Justine, from writebynight.net said the 6 letter word I dreaded,”REVISE!”

It took almost three years of writing to have the final accomplishment in my hands and hopefully, yours.

Looking back, it was worth every agony and every rejection I met to receive the outpouring of love and support for my memoir.

I know that feeling because reading the first book about the childfree lifestyle I got, “The Baby Trap”, by Ellen Peck, set me free to be proud of being a non-parent.

(Later, non-parent was changed to “childfree”.)

When my editor suggested it may be time to update my memoir, I agreed. However, it wasn’t long before we knew I was gestating another book.

The birth of book 2 is now eminent. Without a doubt, I’m humbled and honored to feel it will help more of my childfree family.

Today, I finished a chapter that had me crying.

It wasn’t  because I heard the word, “REVISE” from Justine. It was because she said, “Marcia, this is the best writing I’ve seen from you”.

The interesting fact about the chapter is… it’s about you! You are the brave people who stepped up to share your innermost feelings with me. You are the ones who took a chance, even from

countries where you may face the wrath of others. You are the ones who inspired me to see how much we still need to make this a viable respected lifestyle allover the world!

I’m still breathless with feeling humbled and excited in writing this book and seeing the end in sight. I can’t wait to let you know it’s birthed.

The one thing I want you to know, is how much we need to keep on keeping on to feel pride in our awesome lifestyle choice. I would urge you to find something your heart can connect to knowing

you’re affecting the lives of others for the better. And, if it’s simply our own life, that’s also wonderful.

 

 

April 10th, 2017

MEET ME AT THE NOT MOM SUMMIT

This may be one of those highlights of my 74 years on this planet.

I’m the keynote opening speaker for the wonderful and wonder-filled NOTMOMSUMMIT

http://thenotmom.com/the-notmom-summit-2017/this Oct, 6-8th in Cleveland Ohio.

Without a doubt, those who attend will leave with a renewed and inspirational excitement for the childfree lifestyle.

Those sitting on the fence will hear why it may be a good idea to jump off that fence and wrap your hearts around a way to happiness you never imagined.

Those who can’t have children, shouldn’t have children or don’t want to have children will be shown love,

respect and how to overcome feelings of rejection from friends, family and co-workers who may mean well

but are only perpetuating the myths they’ve been lead to believe is an assumed biological destiny for all.

I’m honored and overwhelmed at the opportunities I have with the other presenters to reach your hearts.

I also look forward to meeting as many of my peeps as I can!

Hugs,
Marcia Drut-Davis

January 3rd, 2017

Our NOKID GROUP CRUISE. WHY?

Why a Group Cruise?
Here are some of the reasons:
Reduced Fares and a Tremendous Value
Cruises are virtually all-inclusive vacations. One price includes all accommodations, meals, many activities on board the ship, and entertainment. By traveling as a group, we’ll qualify for special group discounts and rates.
Hassle-Free Vacation
With a Group Cruise, you unpack once and let the ship’s crew do the rest.
Multi-Interest Floating Resorts
Our cruise ship offer something for everyone regardless of their interests or personality. There’s plenty to keep every member of the group entertained.
Accommodations for Any Budget
We still have a number of different types of staterooms for any budget including: inside cabins, suites, balcony staterooms, and ocean view staterooms.

We also have “The Haven” with a private butler, restaurant, spa privileges and awesome additional amenities!
Group Dining
There’s maximum flexibility available for group dining on our cruise ship. Our group can elect to dine together or choose independent dining options.
Award Winning Entertainment
Our cruise ship offers first-rate award winning Broadway and Las Vegas-style musical revues; comedians; magic shows; piano bars; high energy discos; and live music to keep us entertained from sun down to sun up. The casino is also fun. You can use your on board credit there!
Fun & Getting to Know Each Other
A Group Cruise gives us a chance to share a common experience, which is choosing the childfree lifestyle and never hearing, “So? How many kids do you have? Our group activities like our private dinners first and last nights at sea, late night fun, and festivities will help us get to know one another.
High Satisfaction Vacations
Cruises have the highest guest satisfaction rating in the entire travel industry. Cruise Line studies show that groups that travel together on a cruise will return again as a group within two years of their first trip. We’ll be doing this on our Get-A-Way NCL cruise along the Mexican Coast, December 3-10th, 2017! Our special group pricing and amenities ends soon. Will you be with us?

Info: nokidcruise@gmail.com.

I’LL BE HOSTING AND SPEAKING!
Love you all,
Marcia Drut-Davis

July 22nd, 2016

It’s Another Childfree Group Cruise, 2017

The memories from our first gala cruise still linger. Now, we want to add more memories with another opportunity to be with like-minded people. You’ll never hear, “So? How many kids do you have?”
We leave on Dec 3, 2017 (That’s over a year and a half from now!) We cruise on the same ship: NCL’S Getaway down the Mexican Riviera coast stopping at Roatan Bay Islands, Harvest Caye, Belize, Costa Maya and Cozumel. You can purchase shore excursions to see the Mayan Ruins, take a thrilling ZIP line experience, swim, snorkel on a private island or kiss a dolphin.
Pricing starts at 489.00 pp for an Inside cabin. (You just read that right.) For more pricing on ocean view cabins and balconies and The Haven, a ship within a ship with a butler…go to NOKIDCRUISE@gmail.com. I’ll attach information. But hurry. These prices and first choice cabins will go back to NCL on 9/14/2016.
You’ll also get 4 specialty dining meals FREE and 75.00 per cabin on board credit.
Only 50.00 assures you a place. 125.00 pp gets your name on your chosen cabin. All money is refundable up to 120 days from sailing.
Singles can purchase a studio cabin and not have to pay double as all other cruise ships insist upon. They are going fast!
Hoping to give and get hugs on a trip to make a lifetime memory.
Hugs,
Marcia Drut-Davis

April 9th, 2016

Facing Another Mother’s Day!

Mother’s Day is approaching. I remember my mom. She was wonderful. However, it was a crapshoot. I won. Many don’t. Many are born to women lured into the myth of being a mother. From the time their first doll is placed, they’re filled with the game of being a mommy.
It’s not a game. It’s a choice too many take for granted without any clue of reality. There are no courses, exams or honest revelations about mothering. Because of pronatalism, which exalts the status of parenting in the media, arts, music and society, women dive in for that exalted title. Many never stop to question, “Am I parent material? Do I have enough money to raise a child? Do I know what the lifestyle really means? Would I be happier not raising children?”
If we’re honest, some should never be a mother.
I’m against Mother’s Day. I applaud those doing a good job in their profession as a parent. What? Mothering a profession? In my opinion, if it were thought of that way, there would be happier children and parents. Child abuse could be diminished. Sadly, the ones who say, ”I don’t want to be a mother” are often shunned, maligned or deemed to be immature, destined to change their minds. Or, worse yet, destined to regret their selfish choice. The ones who face infertility are seen as barren, doomed to face a life of incompleteness. We can never mention that many parents may have regrets too.
For me, I celebrate the freedom to carefully make life choices. If mothering equals nurturing, then I’ve done that. I’ve nurtured those I taught, my rescued dog, garden, husband and best of all, myself. Selfish? No. Smart. I happily, without any regrets at 73, chose the childfree lifestyle.

December 27th, 2015

The Joys of a Childfree Group Cruise

Our first of what we hope to be annual childfree group cruises, was a huge success. Fourteen people met as strangers and left as extended family members
It took me an entire year to plan this, find the right cruise line, and get Laura Scott our awesome guest speaker.
The highlights of the cruise, as shared by the people attending, was first… the choice in using Norwegian Cruise Lines. Thanks to K&E International Travel and visiting the actual ship, “The Getaway”, it was a good choice. They embrace the freestyle cruising idea meaning, no first and second seatings for dining, no requirement of jackets or dressing every night and tons of choices on board. The food, service, cabins and entertainment were stellar. The shore excursions were fun. (So was staying on -board when everyone got off!)
The next best thing was simply meeting each other. There were two days at sea to meet as a group. Laura Scott, Author of “Two IS Enough: A Couples Guide to the Childfree Lifestyle” and “The Childfree Documentary”, was a fabulous supporter of teaching how to handle the naysayers who incorrectly label childfree people as selfish or immature. We laughed at some role playing and felt empathy for those who are shunned by family or friends.
I shared my “60 Minutes” taping from 1974 where, “pardon our perversion for airing this on Mother’s Day” was heard by Mike Wallace. Sadly, it was agreed that not much has changed! Laura shared a piece of her documentary.
When we met to say good by, we all agreed that a memory of a lifetime was created. For some, they will no longer fear saying they are childfree by choice. For others, they still must fear their truths as their professions may be in jeopardy.
I’m already planning another adventure for December of 2016. It will probably be on the newest NCL ship, The Escape. We already have the first speaker, Jesse Nochols who is a MAN! If remotely interested, place your name on the NOKIDCRUISE@ gmail.com mailing list. It will be a first come, first served basis once I have the dates and cabins locked in. If you’re single, this cruise lines offers a single studio cabin! (Unheard of in other cruise lines.)

This site had been closed down due to a very bad hacking. It took months to get us back. We are back, proud and excited to reach your hearts.

Marcia Drut-Davis

 

July 14th, 2015

WE BIRTHED A CHILDFREE GROUP CRUISE!

It’s official. I’m super excited to announce we have a HAPPY2BCHILDFREE group cruise on a luxurious Norwegian Cruise-line. this December 2015.

Picture this: a deliciously fun experience with like-minded people who’ll never ask, “Why don’t you have kids?” Add to this, the authors: Laura Carroll, “The Baby Matrix”, Laura Scott, “Two Is Enough” and me, Marcia Drut-Davis, “Confessions of a Childfree Woman”. We’ll have a few private meetings on board when we’re out at sea.  Panel discussions, airing of my infamous “60 Minutes” experience, viewing of  “The Childfree Project” by Laura Scott and talking with our authors will be inspiring and illuminating. Evenings will be in their awesome theater, voted the best of cruising, or dancing, or gambling or enjoying new friendships. The other times, in port, we’ll have a private land excursion company assuring us a childfree group! (No cattle call from the liner with kids!)

Info can be had by emailing me at: nokidcruise@gmail.com.  I’ll send you a lot to read from that gmail address. You’ll have questions.  If I can’t answer them, our travel agency K&E will be a great help with Margie, who is a cruise “maven”.  There are additional taxes and fees but very small. Land excursions are extra. NCL will offer a FREE drink package,  FREE specialty dining every night, 75.00 land excursion credit per port or FREE wifi packages. (You just read that right.) (wink)

Additionally, single people may be able to get a studio inside cabin just for yourself with no added costs as most other cruise-lines charge! They’ll be the first to go.

So……..come with us. Don’t wait too long as cabins are going fast. I’ll send you a link to tour the ship, virtually. Let’s make memories to last a lifetime. Having fought cancer and won, I’ve learned the importance of being with like-minded friends and relishing the joy of fun experiences. I have hugs waiting!

Love you all,

Jim and Marcia

SEE YOU ON BOARD!

 

Marcia Drut-Davis

January 30th, 2015

I’m “Birthing” a CHILDFREE GROUP CRUISE!

You just read that right. All through last year, fighting cancer, I kept thinking when I won the battle of this awful disease, I wanted to meet the many childfree-by-choice people who have shown their love, support and gratitude. This is the opportunity I dreamed about. I’m working with a wonderful travel agency , K&E International, who got us a deal you can’t refuse!

The cruise leaves December 6-13, out of Miami, Florida to The Caribbean. It stops for a full day in a privately owned NCL island, the Cayman Islands, Jamaica and Cozumel.

Imagine being with like minded people who’ll never ask you, “How many kids to you have?” Or when you answer, will never say, “Why? or, “How selfish!”

The speaker we’re having on board is stellar in the land of the childfree: LAURA SCOTT, the author of, “Two Is Enough” will be with us!

What fun we’ll have not to mention the cruise line itself! It’s the luxurious NCL GETAWAY. It’s only one year old! You won’t believe it’s beauty and what it offers on board. The on-land excursions are guaranteed to be childfree as we have our own land agency for that! All stops on the itinerary offer a full day of fun unlike many cruise ships who only dock for a few hours!

If you’re interested …HURRY! Email me at:nokidcruise@gmail.com. Say you heard about this from my blog! I’ll attach all the exciting info.  We only have a certain amount of of saved cabins at the price offered. We have more inquiries than cabins! All the cabins around me and Jim are already booked. ( Steve Harvey hawked this ship on a recent TV show with on-board videos!)

Much love to all. Hope to see you on-board and helping to make a memory we’ll long remember.

Marcia Drut-Davis

 

December 13th, 2014

Childfree By Choice Among Gays/Lesbians.

Recently, it came to my attention  how much pressure gay and lesbian people feel to have children. And why not? When the ideal picture of a family is having the addition of at least one child, they’re under the same cultural

incentives/myths to go forth and multiply.

Since biologically they can’t, they’re often  made to feel  they should search out a surrogate, or explore in-vitro, sperm donors and adoption. They’re not to be thought of as a couple without them!

If they’re “out” and in a committed relationship, it get’s worse. Apparently that perfect ideal of happiness is to have a child at all costs! Even after the wedding, in the states where it’s acceptable, there are the not- so -subtle

hints of adding a baby to fulfill their lives. Without that child, the couple is lacking something

In the past, we were influenced by many TV shows extolling the joys of having children. Ah yes! “The Brady Bunch” were so happy together as a blended family of eight children with a nanny. All worries or challenges were

accomplished within a half hour time frame. Very realistic! It was applauded by the many advertisers and people turning in to see the show. After viewing, it left them with  more pronatal yearnings to have more kids!

Now, we have “Modern Family” where a gay couple adopts a daughter who gives them such feelings of joy and accomplishment even though she can be a pain in the ass.

On my facebook blog, I recently corresponded with a gay man who shared how much he appreciated my memoir, “Confessions of a Childfree Woman” (Amazon.com) My facebook site: facebook.com/childfreereflections

is another support network he enjoys. Being constantly inundated by friends and family trying to get him to think about having children gets old.

I’m so proud and delighted to have a place in his heart. He’s wished a beautiful, fulfilling and healthy life. I hope he continues to make his own choices with as much pride and dignity as any parent.

 

 

 

 

 

October 14th, 2014

ANNOUNCEMENT

I’ve been away from this blog fighting cancer. I’m back… having won the fight!

Soon, you’ll be reading interviews about people following me from my facebook site: http://facbook.com/chidfreereflections.

The first will be one of our men. It will be a fascinating share of being childfree….. from his perspective.

HUGS,

Marcia