Childfree Reflections

With Marcia Drut-Davis
July 15th, 2013 by Marcia Davis

Living Childfree by Choice Weekend Reflections: July 12, 2013

The weekend is here.  I’m grateful for that.  As you know, living childfree is very fulfilling. Therefore, schedules can be quite full during the week. I thought I’d change things a little this weekend while sharing some thoughts with you.

The first thing I’ve thought about is the praise I’ve received from the men and women who read my book.  I feel overjoyed, and sometimes brought to tears when I read your heartfelt messages.  It means the world to me that you’re  helped or supported reading my memoir.  It’s truly the highlight of my childfree legacy  considering the world told me I would never have this moment.  Here is a big cyberspace hug to everyone.

The second thing I’ve  thought about is the power of Twitter and Facebook.  Thank you to all the childfree men and women who have  interacted with me through that media. I love reading your answers to the questions I post.  I also enjoy reading your comments on different childfree videos and blog posts that I post. Please continue doing that. You’ve made me feel like a welcomed member of the online childfree community. For that, I’m very grateful.

If you ever have  questions or need any advice, please ask.  There are no stupid questions. I’m always available for me childfree friends.  If I could meet you all, I would.

The third thing I’ve been thinking about is an article that extols parenthood to the nth degree.  There were so many points made in this article that didn’t sit well with me.  I wrote counterpoint reflections after each point Ms. Zipp  shared.  There will be more point-counterpoint reflections in the near future.

Feel free to comment too!

10 Ways Motherhood Makes You Feel Younger.

By Michelle Zipp

Point, counter/point

By Marcia Drut-Davis, Author “Confessions of a Childfree Woman”

 

Sometimes, I shake my head in disbelief when I read something that doesn’t make sense. Now, don’t get me wrong! I’m sure the woman who wrote the 10 ways being a mom made her feel young shared honest feelings. The danger is when people read this and think, “I’m missing that! I want to feel young too and I have no kids.” For those people, here’s my take on 10 ways not being a mother can make you feel young.

1. Halloween Dress Up. I don’t have to spend hours walking with my children door to door then sifting through their candy looking for needles or poison. The stress of Halloween is gone making me feel younger and peaceful while parents are worrying, watching and caring for their children as they should.

2. Taking Naps with Kids. I prefer choosing when and if I want to take any nap. Love those rainy days when I snuggle in my bed with a good read and drift off to a wonderful, refreshing nap. Parents have to grab them when they can, if they can.

3. Playing with Kids Toys: I have my own toys: my Kindle to read great books, my tennis racket to enjoy when and if I want to, my piano to sit and enjoy when and if I want to, my gardening tools to use when and if I want to, my mat to do yoga when and if I want to, my beach chair and blanket to use when and if a I want to and so much more. (The “when and if I want to” words aren’t any part of a parent’s lexicon unless they have a nanny.) My husband has a model train room with his own toys. No kids interrupt this hobby. He gets to do it whenever he wants to.

4.Watching Cartoons Parents can feel “high on a cloud” watching Yo Gabba Gabba. Really? I prefer to watch my own amusing TV or no TV at all. Yo Gabba Gabba isn’t high on my list.

5. You feel like you know nothing. That’s making you feel “young”? In my opinion, that makes you feel dumb! It’s true parents know very little about how to raise or take care of children. I would find that to feel frustrating and even frightening and not youthful.

6.You’ll Dread Prom Night . In my opinion, this does not make anyone feel younger! In fact, it helps grow earlier gray hairs worrying about the safety of child on that night. For me, not worrying about whether or not my daughter will engage in sex and not be protected or whether my son will drink and have a car accident makes me feel older, not younger.

7. Acne Really? You want to feel younger by having hormonal acne after having a child? Really? I prefer going to get a rejuvenating facial and not worrying about the expense or time I spend there. That makes me look and feel younger.

8. Playing loud music and singing. I do it all the time in the shower and my car, alone, without hearing, “MOM! Stop that!

9. Running  I agree. Running can make you feel better and help you stay healthier to preserve youth. However, I choose to run when I want to and not after kids all day. (Or, taking them to all their after-school activities.)

10. Amusement Parks Did I really read that sitting on a toddlers choo-choo train is fun and makes you feel young? I prefer Disney adult rides than waiting for hours to go round and round in a boring ride feeling my butt stuck to the sides of the seat.

 

Feeling younger is a result of lifestyle, heredity and wise choices. For me, living the childfree lifestyle gives me opportunities to take better care of myself and enjoy life.

At 70 years young, I’m going strong, look terrific and can’t wait for what happens next.

 P.S. If you enjoyed this post, you may be interested in reading my book.

Comments

4 Responses to “Living Childfree by Choice Weekend Reflections: July 12, 2013”
  1. Not having kids doesn’t mean you can’t go to to an amusement park (although I guess it does mean you can’t ride the kiddy rides, but if you’re into that you could always offer to take a friend or relative’s child with you). My husband and I went to Legoland Deutschland without kids in tow and we were definitely in the minority. But we also got to see what we wanted to see and do what we wanted to do and didn’t have to walk slowly and take a bunch of walking breaks or say “no” a thousand times when they want to buy everything in sight. There is nothing on that list I couldn’t do a version of without children if I were so inclined.

    • marciadavis says

      Again, I agree with you my childfree sister! Sometimes, I wonder if people who write these things are trying to convince themselves they made the right choice!(LOL)

  2. Great post! I laughed out loud a few times. Acne making you feel young, really? How young you feel is 100% based on your thoughts. If you have positive thoughts like “life is exciting”, “possibilities are endless”, or “I’m open to learning” then you will feel young. If you’re thinking is negative like “life is hard”, “people are bad”, or “I don’t feel good” then you will feel older regardless of how old the calendar says that you are.

    • marciadavis says

      I agree, Allison. I laughed as I wrote the counter-point too. Sometimes, you just sit back and have to laugh, right?
      Have you read my memoir? If so, what did you enjoy the most? If not, go stand in the corner. (ONLY KIDDING!)
      Cyber-space Hugs,
      Marcia

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