Childfree Reflections

With Marcia Drut-Davis
April 19th, 2011 by Marcia Davis

Are we being pressured into choosing parenting?

Ellen Peck’s infamous 1974 book “The baby Trap” was the first time I ever heard of the word “pronatalism”. Once I read the definition and began to see how social expectations, media, the arts, and religion suggest normalcy as becoming a parent, I went on a hunt to find proof pronatalism existed. I found, and still find, ads in magazines and TV selling their products with children depicted.That product may have nothing to do with children but there they are! I’ve heard songs echo great love, joy and  fulfillment about having children. Only recently did a song speak of abuse (Crystal Bowersox, “Farmer’s Daughter”) or parents needing a drink raising teenage daughters. (Martina Mcbride, “Teenage Daughters”) Weddings are seen as the start of a family of more than two when people don’t even know if the couple want,  should have or can have children!

Are you aware of pronatalism? I invite you to watch your TV ads. What is the product or service being “sold”? Is it directly related to children or are children in that ad used to suggest it’s the goal of every person on this planet? Are the children all pretty, sweet, adoring? What’s being sold other than the product?What pressures have you felt through pronatalism?

In m book, “Confessions of a Childless Woman”, I share how my life was threatened and how I lost my beloved career of teaching for 16 years as a result of pronatalism.

Comments

6 Responses to “Are we being pressured into choosing parenting?”
  1. Your talk last night at Panera Bread in Stuart was great. Telling about your choice not to have children on “60 Minutes” was really interesting. It was amazing how that show changed your life, including your career, the threats to you and your dog. It was even more amazing how nothing was directed toward your husband. The open discussion and questions after your talk showed a real need to get this topic out into open discussion, maybe even a talk show. I can’t wait until I can get a copy of your book! How do we get you to speak at other organizations?

    • marciawp says

      I have never, in all the years since I was interviewed on “60 Minutes, ever thought about the fact that my then husband, Warren…..never had anything against him for living a childfree lifestyle. I mean his business flourished. I lost a career as a passionate teacher! His life was never threatened; mine was!
      As for having me talk, just email me at mdjd7@yahoo.com and we can arrange a mutually agreeable time. Thanks for asking.

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